Why do so many youth ministry kids end up leaving the faith in their 20s?

This is a question that has bothered me for well over a decade, both watching it in my own personal ministry and observing it to be true in almost all youth ministry models in the U.S. . Here is the reality. We are MUCH better at getting kids in the door of our ministry and a preliminary profession of faith than we are at creating life-long disciples. We lose students by the droves.

Take a look at this outline. Does it seem to hit at what roles how we do youth ministry might play in this crisis? There are obviously many factors at play and there certainly are lots of individuals who come to lasting faith through youth ministry. But, why do we lose so many?

Here is my outline.

Leaving Youth Group, Leaving Faith

            (We can rescue the vanishing generation in the church. We just have to change most of how we think about youth ministry).

What needs to change?

We are great at weddings, and not so good at marriages.

(Looking at group numbers and para-church conversions, youth ministry looks to be in great shape. Where are these kids 10 years later?).

Giving black and white answers in an increasingly gray world.

 (Leaving students ill-equipped to deal with the questions, doubts and challenges to faith that come after high school).

Orphans in their own home.

(We have students deeply immersed in the culture of your youth group or ministry, but with no sense of their place in the larger body of Christ and the larger working of God in history).

Bait and Switch. Selling grace, delivering legalism.

(Kids come into faith through our beautiful presentations of grace and leave when they fail and feel our judgment).

Just another narcissistic fix.

(Preaching a self-centered Gospel instead of Jesus’ message of ‘reconciling all things’).

The Myth of Superman.

(We project and certainty and perfection when our students are yearning for transparency and honesty).

What do you think?